Celebrating the festive season overseas

Ever wondered what it’s like to teach in a foreign country about what it means to celebrate Christmas in the western world? Here’s what it’s like…

Christmas in China is a strange experience, as most experiences here have proven to be. I am knee deep in January right now and the christmas decorations are still everywhere, the consistent feeling that at least some of the westernisation of Beijing has been done by people who have read a radio times description of A Muppets Christmas Carol. The basics are there, the Christmas trees, Santa sometimes and a lot of sparkly things and lights. It was very light on reindeer and very heavy on, at least in my school, strange parties full of drinkless drinking games to help slowly integrate the kids into the spirit of christmas. Completely side stepping the commercialisation of it, it’s about remembering your friends, bonding with new friends and appreciating your family. All the stuff we are supposed to have been doing up until now. Though I kind’ve get the feeling that kids in my school are extraordinarily wealthy so they already have their iPhones, their iPads and their playstation Vitas so they want for very little, which I understand to not be the norm throughout china, but in this circumstance it definitely is.

The party that was had at christmas in my school also allowed me to discover a very strange thing where shyness and inability don’t seem to work here at all. One of the children, at least, is notoriously shy and quiet and yet volunteered to stand up and sing a song unaccompanied in front of the class. I was also asked to do this but declined since all the songs I know the words to are either Power Metal and therefore impossible to sing, or Steel Panther lyrics and therefore completely inappropriate at any circumstance unless you are at a Steel Panther gig.

My part ended up accompanying my student on guitar with a song that he liked by a Chinese artist. The difficulties that arose from me trying to use a language I don’t know as a yard stick for when I’m supposed to change chords was very hard, considering I had to play the same thing about thirty times in a row, even just counting that made it very easy for me to lose my place. Due to the copy of the song we were learning being a really terrible bootleg we also had to basically write the song apart from the lyrics. I am proud to say that I made quite a few mistakes and yet we seemed to get away with it entirely.

Everyone of the teachers then stood up in front of the classes, which was being MC’d by a different teacher who seemed more like someone who would have his own game show than someone who worked in a school. One of the game shows that involved a mixture of humiliation and laughing at the misfortune of others paired with a sincere desire to see everyone having fun. Perhaps some sort’ve element where someone proposes to their girlfriend on live television, and when she says yes and cries with joy, only then would it be revealed that her fiancee is actually a velociraptor that eats torso and destroys the house. Then doesn’t even turn the lights off on the way out.

I am not famous for my ability to join in with anyones reindeer games out’ve some sort’ve social anxiety that comes from the oxymoron that is ‘being made to have fun’ and this was no exception. However, it wasn’t about me as much as it was about introducing the kids to this time honoured end of year celebration. It was an amazing experience to be a part of. It didn’t make me miss the insanity of christmas back home.